catching up

Blogger always says I forget my password, but really it is always the same. I think they are forgetting my password just to make me change it every time.

Well. I believe I ought to update this. It's Friday, I didn't get home from work until 8.30 (pants & umbrella sourcing at the mall takes so long) and I am putting homework aside for this evening. I'm so busy lately and mildly overwhelmed. Behind at work, apartment a mess, etc. Trying to decide when and where I'll start school. Not to mention which book to read first, what to wear tomorrow. My outfits are so boring lately, I'm tired of all my clothes. They never look the way I want. I did buy new pants today (kind of expensive ones) but I'm not sure that I love them. Hopefully they'll grow on me, especially once I try them on with heels. And I never wear skirts anymore because I can't be bothered with nylons. Oh well, warm weather's coming. Okay, I feel better now that I have noted those things. They are all manageable. I will get up tomorrow morning and go to yoga at the Y, come home and study and tidy to assuage feelings of guilt, and snack on the chili I made and all will be well. Come monday I will toil dilligently to catch up at work.

My writing is so boring and colourless. I need to stretch my brain and typing fingers around corners and down new passages but... that seems like so much work. I think this is the real bother lately, I must be directing my energy into other places and it leaves me with no time to be creative, to think, to write, to play with my clothes and hair, to paint and arrange and all those things. And to drum, play guitar, harmonica-ize.

Aside: I don't like the idea that any old person could come across this particular little thing on the internet and say "oh, dull" and click away. They're MY paragraphs, I wrote them for my interest and illucidation and they'll be as bloody boring as I want them to be!

My quest to learn Spanish is going slowly. I want to go to Argentina. I want to take holidays, trips. I want to spend the summer in Victoria and start school in the fall. I want to go to Dar Es Salaam because I read it this morning and I like the sound of it. I want to go to Amalfi. I want to teach myself calculus. I want to find the perfect boots and purse. I want to dye my black pants so they'll be sharp again. I want to wander down Ossington and find really coooool things and bring them home and nicen-up my aparment and my closet. I kind of want to take my new pants back and spend it all on - I don't know, vintage sunglasses and a blazer or some damn thing. I want to be half the time poised, polished, French, businesswoman, professional, hair smooth, BlackBerry at the ready. The other half of the time I want to wear patterned tights and have my hair loose and unbrushed and sew my clothes and leave Toronto for extended adventures.

Wait! I know what it is I really need: plans are made to go out tomorrow night. I haven't gone dancing, drunken, lovely in forevvvvvver. Call me if you want to join, those of you (1?) who are realy in Toronto.

And for now I want to go put clothes away and then relax, loll, read in bed. Lovely.